


6. Puzzle

by sweaterwearinlesbian



Series: Deathnotetober [6]
Category: Death Note & Related Fandoms
Genre: (past) hurt/(current) comfort, Deathnotetober, Long haired Near, M/M, Nonbinary Character, Nonbinary Near, Selectively Mute Near, bad metaphors, day 6: puzzle, gun violence mention, implied scars, oh yeah i’m bustin out all the big guns for this one, this didn’t go how i expected it to but oh well
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-10-18
Updated: 2019-10-18
Packaged: 2020-12-23 20:11:18
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,066
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21087134
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/sweaterwearinlesbian/pseuds/sweaterwearinlesbian
Summary: Near liked to think about their life as one giant puzzle. All of the actions, thoughts, and the people they met were simply pieces of it. Their death would be the last one.





	6. Puzzle

Near liked to think about their life as one giant puzzle. All of the actions, thoughts, and the people they met were simply pieces of it. Their death would be the last one. They thought about their death often: in their line of work it was hard not to. Chasing down the most violent and perverted of criminals meant that your life was constantly in danger, even if the world only knew you as L.

When Near was shot for the first time they expected death. Mello would never let it happen, of course, protective ass that he is, but Near secretly craved it just so their mind could rest. The asshole who shot them didn’t quite get why what he did was wrong, but he couldn’t figure it out before Mello had put a bullet between his eyes. Mello let a breath hiss out from between his clenched teeth and helped Near up. “What a fuckwit. Lemme get you to Matt, get you sorted out.” Near couldn’t walk as the bullet was lodged in his calf (Near made a wild mental note of every artery in the human body and then narrowed it down to the ones that could be hit) so Mello scooped them up and carried them. Near was going to protest that they could walk themself but then it occurred to them that they had already tried that. 

Matt was hardly an expert on medicine but he managed to patch Near up well enough that they didn’t need to see a proper doctor. Near suspected that Mello had more than his fair share of bullet holes and Matt had more than his fair share of experiences patching him up. Matt was only a little alarmed that they had gotten shot: after all, Mello had wanted to shoot them for years before he wanted to kiss them. Mello gave him a thank you kiss for patching Near up, which left Matt’s face almost as red as his hair. 

“No need for thanks Mels, it’s kinda my job to make sure you two don’t die.” Mello laughed, his nose scrunching adorably. 

“I was worried about them Matt, so it's a well-deserved thank you.” Near pouted where they lay on the once bloodied table. 

“Where’s my I’m-glad-you-aren’t-dead kiss? Don’t leave me out!” So they were a little bit whiny when they were shot, sue them. So their lovely loves in an uncharacteristic show of affection smothered them in nonstrenuous attention (they would yell at them later). 

Near thought back on this memory with great fondness, even if the verbal ass kicking later was horrible. If their life was a puzzle, but Mello and Matt were the prettiest pieces. Matt tugged on one of Near’s braids (he loved braiding Near’s hair now that they grew it out. They both found it soothing).

“What’s going on in that cute head right there? You’re being awful quiet.” Near sighed, tilting their head down then jolting back up when Matt tugged on their hair again. 

“Just thinking about the first time I got shot.” Matt went still. Near pressed on, if only out of curiosity for that reaction. “I love you guys so much. It’s a wonderful memory.” Matt tugged their hair for a third time and Near stifled a yelp. 

“It isn’t for us Near. Mello was scared half to death and I swear I haven’t seen that much blood come from a bullet wound in ages, not since, well, not since I got shot in that plaza in Japan.” Near wished they could nod but since Matt held their hair they opted not to. 

“I apologize Matt, I wasn’t aware that I cause you both so much pain.” Matt laughed and nimbly finished the first braid. 

“I know. You’re special like that, similar to how Mello is. You don’t realize how much we love you.” Near mulled this over for a moment and then responded, tongue in cheek:

“Well I think I’m beginning to get an inkling.” Matt's laugh rumbled against Near’s back and they repressed the urge to shudder. They pushed Matt’s hands out of their hair and climbed up to hug him. Even though Near was much taller now that they were fully grown, Matt was still bigger and softer. Mello and Near were all sharp edges and blunt words but Matt was soft and kind spoken. Near wrapped their arms around Matt, tucking their head into the crook of his neck. “I’m sorry love.” Near wasn’t one for pet names but they could make an exception. They were beginning to understand how Matt and Mello felt, when they thought back to that horrible day in Japan. 

“Don’t worry about it Nate.” Their given name being spoken aloud made Near hide further into Matt, clinging to him for dear life. It was at this moment that two things happened: Mello walked into the room with two mugs of hot chocolate as well as a monster, and Near began to cry. 

“What in God’s good name is going on here? I leave for 20 minutes, I swear.” Matt made a shushing motion with the hand that wasn’t supporting Near’s back. “Oh.” They only ever shushed each other when someone was hurting. Even when they were mad they never said shut up, never told the others to be quiet. 

“Near, don’t cry. We love you. You didn’t do anything that would make that not true, you just worried us is all. See, Mello brought hot chocolate. He wouldn’t do that for just anyone now would he?” Near peaked their face out from Matt’s neck long enough to see Mello’s softening face. He fidgeted briefly before speaking. 

“Yeah, uh, we do… love you that is. Whatever you’re thinking about, it’s not enough to get rid of us right? We’re in it for the long haul.” Near’s smile was watery and they made grabby hands at the mug, a sure sign that their emotions had rendered them mute. Mello wrapped himself around the two of them after he passed out the drinks. “It’s alright now, we’ve got you.” Near nodded, and the three of them didn’t move from the bed other than to get under the covers and turn on movies, Near’s hair still half braided. 

They are the missing pieces of my puzzle, not just the prettiest pieces. They complete me. I am whole with them near me.

**Author's Note:**

> This got away from me! They just wanted to keep talking and talking and talking and i was like ‘y’all i’ve got other fics to write’. 
> 
> Tumblrs - sweaterwearinlesbian (main) & lightsturtleneck (dn)


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